Spent Monday recovering and running errands. Went out to dinner with M, was good to catch up. When I go tto bed I literally fell asleep 2 minutes after my bed hit my pillow.
Went to Guys and Dolls on Tuesday with M. Made some strides with the SCM there, the main security guard who works at the door finally recognized me and we got into conversation. I jumped the yellow to green light when I told him I was in Austin for the weekend (going-forward principle!!!), because apparently he's from Texas as well. We got around to chatting about how Texas is different (friendlier, cheaper etc…) and overall a different hustle at the end of the day. Then some Asian girls walked by and we started talking about telling Asians apart (he's getting better at it…). Crossing my fingers, but having rapport with both him and the security guard behind the door should help a lot with my getting in on Tuesdays, though I've surprisingly never really been turned away yet. Don't want to jinx myself, but I don't think it'll be a problem getting in there anymore.
I think I've hit a breakthrough with the inner game digging I've been doing over the past couple weeks regarding approaching/energy levels/getting in state. How can I tell? Well, I would go around and open sets, and it wouldn't be a big adrenaline rush, nor was it a forced overcoming of anxiety. Instead, opening was just very neutral… a very normal, unexciting thing. I think this is perfect, it's exactly what I want it to be. I achieved this by priming the sets with the idea that none of this is very serious and I shouldn't take it seriously…opening and talking to girls really isn't that important. From there, the opening became just a normal thing, and I was able to plow through the initial few sets with ease, and land myself into the state of Indifference.
This is huge, and should really help with my progression. For the past few weeks, the thing that has been holding me back has been not opening consistently, or having opening be this big task requiring a lot of mental energy to go do (see my previous posts), where it should have been what it was last night… a neutral, unexciting, normal thing. Big inner game stride I need to keep hammering on.
The night itself was alright. I opened sets, but not as consistently as I think I would if M wasn't there, and got some green lights but didn't really connect with anyone. Here's a quick run-down:
Set 1: M talked to some Canadian girls and I came in… we lost at them at the bar, and when we saw them again, one of the girls was way too drunk. (yellow)
Set 2: Opened a girl at one of the tables. She opened green. It started logical, with talking about the store she was working at (they were at the venue for a grand opening party). I teased her about being a janitor there, it didn't hit, and I pursued it for a bit too long and it blew me out (green)
Set 3: Came back to the table at some point and talked to Set 2's friend. It started out as a warm approach (introduced by one of the guys we had met), and I did a series of cold reads. I must not have built enough rapport on each of them, because she jokingly said I was just laying it all out. After that the set went downhill. (green)
Set 4: Was by the table and pulled in a 2-set. Talked to one and M paired off the other. It was going good… I pointed her as being not from LA, she was from the OC. I asked her if she surfed… she does. We talked about long/short boarding, then about skiing, and I jumped into a role-play about brining her to Switzerland with me (should have taken it to marriage divorce). Her friend red-lighted and they got pulled away, but it was still an open-ended set, though I didn't seem them later in the night. (green)
Set 5: Mixed set outside (3 girls and 1 guy). Heard them talking about hookers and I came in situationally. Joked about how I wanted a hooker, but I had very specific tastes (I wanted a 250+ black woman… and not light-colored black… like Akon black). One of the girls turns to her friend and was like "omg he said akon black" and I was in. Started joking about all kinds of ridiculous shit, from drugs to racism, then they went inside for a drink. (yellow)
Set 6: Opened two girls that were walking by. They weren't having it, but I forced one of them into a high-5. Saw them a few minutes later, and opened them again, asking them if they were more friendly. She actually turned green and M took her and I split off into her friend (who was green). I disqualified myself as being gay, but I don't think I heightened it enough, and she actually thought I was maybe gay (which would blow me out later). Things were going okay, though there was no real rapport. (red) (green)
Saw her again later by the table and started escalating but at one point she was like "so.. are you actually gay?" I said no and she started telling me about how a couple years ago some guy pretended to be gay to hit on her. That was the end of that set… If I was smarter, I should have yes-anded her "are you actually gay questioned." If I was even smarter, I would have heightened even better in the beginning.
Set 7: Made eye contact with a really cute blonde by the bar, and weaved my way into her group telling her "You could at least say hi." She opened up a "hi" with a green light, but just as that was happening, I got tackled by my buddy Jayson, and I lost the set. (green)
Set 8: There was a girl by the bar, I made eye contact with her and opened her, and she introduced me to the birthday girl (who was incidentally Jayson's friend). I joked about it being her sweet 16, and I hung onto the joke too long, and waited to long to drop the line about driving her dad's mini-van (should have happened right away). The girls got pulled away, and she lost interest right about there. (yellow)
Set 9: Saw the girls from Set 5 on the dance floor and I opened up one of the girls who I hadn't spoken to earlier. Her friend blew out M, but the girl I was talking to was receptive. Her friends pulled them to the bathroom though and I lost her (damn logistics) (yellow)
Set 10: Went direct on a dime outside. She said thanks, and M came in shortly after, but they blew us out and went inside "we have to use the bathroom." I lingered too long after the direct opener without stacking forward, and M came in too soon. (red)
Set 11:Earlier in the night opened a group of Asian by their table, but they didn't really speak English and blew me out by saying they were waiting for their non-existant boyfriends (red)
Set 12: Tried to open a girl situational outside, but I didn't speak loud enough and she didn't hear me (red)
M actually pointed out something that I think is really useful for my outer game. I'm not loud enough on my opener. He pointed out that he noticed that a good portion of the sets would "what?" my opener. He's right, I need to come in louder on the opener… this is something I've not been doing and have been more or less unaware of… I thought it had always been because maybe I had been talking too fast. Time to really project on my opener. Should be an easy fix.
I noticed that I was losing a lot of the sets in attraction. The reason for this is I think it was too much spike spike spike and not enough normal rapport. This stood out when that one girl commented on how I was laying everything out (running a stack of cold-reads). I need to build back in more normal rapport and going-first into my conversations. The idea of giving investment to get investment in return. I'll give extra focus to this in my conversation blocks, and this should be an easy fix. Then after I get more normal rapport, I can start peppering in the attraction spikes.
Looking back, I actually opened a solid number of sets… they didn't last that long, so it didn't seem like that many at the time. I'm coming out of the night with 2 very distinct things (going-first, projecting on the opener) to work on though and 1 big accomplishment (inner game fix). Also, I liked the energy/state that I had… it wasn't super-power energy, but it was controlled and relaxed… unnervous.
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