Week 1 - Thursday

So I’m currently on a redeye to Miami to meet Soul, the daygame master himself. That means no going out tonight, which is a bummer since one of M’s friends is having a little Hollywood birthday bash.

On the way to the airport and a bit into the flight, I was able to listen to IVS on The Right Way to Learn Game (Mr. M, The Don and Rokker), and Common Sticking Points (Mr. M, Braddock and Rokker).

IVS Vol 27 - Common Sticking Points (Mr. M, Braddock and Rokker)

I really liked the Common Sticking Points, as it addressed a lot of the key issues people have in the main phases. These are the ones I found pertinent:

Attraction: Should be 2-10 minutes (max!). Mentioned people focus too much on it and turn into the dancing monkey.

Qualification: Reward/relate/tease. Mentioned people don’t tend to reward and relate enough, and/or they fail to keep attraction amped by teasing as well. The key is to use a qualification piece as a springboard into rapport about the issue. Additionally, I liked how they talked about how another key point was to essentially get the message across that you like her for reasons other than her looks (be it through rewarding/relating to questions, or a flat-out deeper into the phase).

Comfort: Passion and purpose. Mentioned that people forget to emphasize their passion during the comfort phase. It’s something that really makes girls sticky – all girls like passionate people.

Kino: Push that shit. Mentioned people don’t kino enough – always be pushing the limits, that’s how you get good. I actually feel I’ve gotten decent at this, but the interview is right, I can still keep pushing the limits.

They also talked about other topics, such as how women like it when guys are sexual etc… -- many of the things that were covered in Mr. M’s bootcamps that were light bulb moments at the time.

IVS Vol 17 – The Right Way to Learn Game (Mr. M , The Don and Rokker)

I made it through about ¾ of this one, and I plan to go back to it later, but it touched on some good points. For the most part, the interview was reinforcement that I’m taking the right steps in learning this properly. Here’s a few key points that were mentioned:

- Keep a going-out journal: Keep a journal with all your experiences of going out and what you learn

- Have distinct goals: Know what you’re looking to get out of game, and what your ultimate goals are

- Sticking points: Make good note of your sticking points and keep working through them.

- Surround yourself with good people: Surround yourself with people that are great with game, this is one of the best ways to learn

- Analyze: Analyze what you’re doing incorrectly and keep making adjustments to fix them.

- Process-oriented: Be process oriented while learning (i.e., am I getting to the next step?)

This reminded me of the framework to always be having while going out: Having fun, sexualizing, easily distraced.

Emersion

I feel I’m starting to reach the point of full emersion again. I remember I felt this way the 10 days of and in between the Oslo and London bootcamps. That is, I’m always thinking about and analyzing game, and my focus on it is so concentrated. I noticed while in this state last time, I had a tendency to improve quickly, and my thoughts were able to build on top of each other. It’s almost as though the growth compounded on itself. And this is only the beginning :)…

Another symptom is I constantly see the frames and subcommunitions of what is happening in the interactions taking place around me. I was watching a couple checking in at the airport and was thinking how the guy’s body language was all off, though he did a great takeaway on his girl. In the couple minutes of spectating, I was able to get a pretty good feel of the dynamic of their relationship.

Each night I’m going out is a learning experience in itself. I hope to get in the habit where it almost feels strange if there’s a night that I’m not going out. Coming from a place where nightclubs and bars used to be associated with negative feelings, the change to positive association is great.

I’m definitely getting closer to the point of no longer giving a fuck (non-reactiveness). Opening is becoming more and more of a natural thing, and I can’t wait till I hit the point where I have the complete mentality of DGAF :).

Good things are happening… let’s keep the momentum going!

Week 1 - Wednesday

Finally! An interesting night…

Went out with Bonsai, some of the other LS guys, and M to MyHouse for what ended up being a two-part night. Part one was a social/yuppie networking night and part two was your usual LA club scene. I went through a range of levels during the night, but I think I’m started to make progress:

Networking Portion
During the networking night portion, I ended up in the same rut I’ve been in over the last two nights. That is, I open up the set, but I can’t get any traction going. The conversation stalls out, and I find myself having to eject. Even the teases I was getting off weren’t hitting and were at times blowing me out. I’m still working through my head to figure out what exactly is going on in these moments that’s causing these symptoms.

I focused on being less high energy, and I think I actually did different and better. When I’m less high energy, I slow down, and am able to process my thoughts. Things tend to imrpove. You know, I think what it is is that I haven’t quite pinpointed the subcommunications that work best for me during attraction. Over the past couple months, I’ve been trying out quite a few subcomms (super state-based, fun guy, more serious etc…) and I haven’t quite honed in on what works best for me.

I guess that’s what this pain period is for… wading through the shit and getting a solid handle on what works.

So most of the sets I got into during the networking night opened, but the interaction didn’t go very far. Towards the end of it though, I got into a set and changed things up a bit. I did more of what I used to do – that is, go for more rapport and then slipping into qualification. As I expected, the set hooked… “hooked,” and I was able to build minor attraction. Got into qualification, and was able to throw small/medium hoop qualifiers (i.e. are you spontaneous etc…), but then I threw a big one (i.e. what are your three best qualities?), and it fell on its face. No surprise there.

About 15-20 minutes into set, she blows me out with a classic “I have to go use the bathroom.” I don’t blame her. There wasn’t much emotional progression, and I was clearly in the LJBF zone (attraction was minimal). So that pretty much concluded the end of the networking portion (8PM to 10PM).

Club Portion
As the networking portion ended, the club owners turned up the music and opened the doors to the greater (and better?) LA. Things began picking up like they do in a normal club, and I go over to M, who’s been in set with this one girl for quite some time. He reels me in and introduces me to the girl’s friend. Definitely the most fun set of the week.

I get in the set – the girl is isolated on a couch. After a minute or two of speaking with her, it’s pretty clear that it’s on (she made the effort for rapport, and her body language / kino said it all). For one reason or another, she was attracted. As Mr. M and Keychain mentioned in bootcamp, some girls will just like you for no particular reason, and in such cases, fuck attraction and just start escalating.

This set actually reminds me a lot of the one I had in Oslo.

So a couple minutes into the set, I start throwing in sexual hoops. I start with a medium one – “if you were my girlfriend and wearing your outfit, we would fuck 5 times a day.” She eats it up, telling me that I’m bad. Given the good reaction, a few minutes later, I throw a big hoop – “you know… if all these people weren’t here, I would bend you over that couch and fuck you so hard… get away from me.” At this point, the girl is notably turned on and into it.

So we move into normal rapport. When things stale out a bit, I state break her with 4 fast questions (snowboarding/skiing, red/black, lingerie/pajamas, have you ever robbed a bank?) To the third question, she replies with “naked,” LOL.” I think I’m going to revise this one in the future to: snowboarding/skiing, red/black, chocolate/strawberries, lingerie/pajamas and have you ever stalked a guy? Seems to have more purpose this way – it starts with plutonic topics then gets more sexual; then the last question frames you as the selector and her as the possible creeper. Good shit.

So I slip into qualification, qualifying her by asking what she does for fun, where she would be if she could be anywhere in the world, and then at some point, give the big reward – “you know, you’re really open minded, and I it’s cool you’re serious about what you do, but that you also have a fun side – I like that about you.”

During this later part, I throw another sexual hoop – “you’re making me think bad things… get away from me.” At some point, I move her to the dance area next to where we were sitting, and close the k. It was pretty easy to get at this point…

In comfort, I ran the truth questions. It started sexual, with my asking the craziest place she’s had sex (answer: a baseball field), but then I moved it deeper, asking her if there was anything she could change about her self, what it would be. She replies that she’d have more patience, and I go into a cold read of some sort, which hits really hard too.

This is the basic gist of it. Some other things that were used along the way. There was another state break “what do you call a black ____________,” some light takeaways (looking away, looking at nails), and a few other cold reads.

As they say, logistics are the mother of all fuckups – this girl was DTF but her friends suddenly decided to leave around 11:30ish. I grab her number, without nearly the appropriate time bridge, but text her right away, and she does respond pretty quickly.

Me: “Crazy Kris, nice meeting you kiddo… I owe you a question ;).”
We were right in the middle of the truth question game when her friends decided it was time to take off
Her: “Tell me your question!”

I decide it’s probably better to leave the loop open, and re-text the next day. Answering the question would I feel have dissipated the momentum.

What I did right: Expressing sexual intent (verbal and physical escalation), state breaking, wide and deep rapport, compliance moving, having the “look” of “I would destroy you,” and leaving her wanting more. Not having to worry much about building initial attraction, my game was hitting hard. Moreover, I didn’t have to think too much about what to do. The training pretty much took over and I was on auto-pilot.

What I would have done differently: Qualification/comfort was there, but it could have been a little stronger. I didn’t use as big of a qualifiers as I could have, and I think I left a lot on the table in terms of room to reward/relate/tease. As for comfort, the girl was really open, and I feel I could have built a deeper connection than I did. There was pretty much full compliance. For attraction, I could have used some more high-level attraction, with stronger and more frequent takeaways and more teases than I did (there was more pull than push than I would have liked).

What I learned: I mentioned yesterday that I had the feeling that if I can clear the attraction hurdle, my game will take a big leap forward. This was an opportunity not to have to worry much about attraction, and my game really skyrocketed. Moreover, the set was genuinely a lot of fun. In a sense, this gives me something to look forward to once I clear this sticking point and make it through the pain period.

Credit to Braddock for these analysis questions btw (IVS Vol 27 – Sticking Points). There’s actually 4 of them, but I can’t think of the 4th question off the top of my head. I think I’m going to try to run this analysis for every worthwhile set or group of unworthwhile sets in the future.

So this takes us to about 11:30ish, and we still have more left in the night. A playmate birthday party actually kicks off, and there’s about 10-15 bombshells in one area – true dimes. Kudos to M, he opens one direct at the bar, and then closes her number as we’re heading out.

In term of the sets that I was in during there end, 2 were worthwhile, though they didn’t really go anywhere. They were worthwhile in a sense that I came in off the bat, and was able to build rapport without getting blown out like I was earlier in the night. I think there’s some really good room for analysis from this. So let’s go ahead and run through some thoughts of what was different in my first few sets (during the networking portion) and the last few.

Attraction Analysis
I think… in my first few sets, I focus too much on hard teasing right away. That coupled with my teasing not being the absolute best, I think this ends up blowing me out sometimes (i.e. the teases aren’t really taken as teases). In addition, my mind wasn’t clicking as fast, and a lot of times, my train of thought would die and the interaction would end.

The set right at the end of the networking part was focused almost all on rapport, and it eventually got boring, at which point I got blown out. I’m not going to count the set that hooked hard, since I feel attraction was more or less of a non-issue in that case.

The sets towards the end of the night started with more general rapport, and then grabbing on to teases a little farther into the interaction, spiking them where I thought they’d be good. This mix seemed to work pretty well – I wasn’t getting blown out early, and it wasn’t getting too boring. The teases in nature were a bit lighter in the beginning to… I think this is good until I get better at it. I also think the general rapport had a little more leeway, since attraction/intent was already expressed through the direct openers I was using (not a type of opener that was appropriate during the networking portion).

I think I’m going to run with this over the next few nights and see what happens. That is, I’ll open direct, and then go more into rapport (question/relate), and light teases a bit in. Then further in, I’ll amp up the teases to see if I can get her really hooked in.

This is a bit of a shift from what seems to be Mr. M’s attraction, where it’s a solid barrage of hard-hitting attraction until it hooks. I’ve tried doing this, but my mind isn’t running fast enough yet, and I don’t have the wealth and mastery of material yet to be able to pull it off. I’ll try the way I laid out, which doesn’t hit as hard, but provides more margin for error, to see if I can build up the skillset. Honestly, getting blown out so early in set so many times has been frustrating and completely unejoyable (plus, I don’t get to work on anything else).

Hopefully, when attraction is less of a sticking point, I can start adopting a more hard-hitting style. Then again, if I latch onto something that works realy well (whatever it may be), I’ll probably go with that.

It’s been an interesting 3 nights – all very different. We’re not even halfway through the week yet!

Week 1 - Tuesday

Went out tonight to Edison in downtown LA with one of the sales guys. The venue was awesome and spacious, but the crowd was again, really unique. As I’ve heard with most places in downtown LA, it was more of the artsy/older crowd – not really my thing. The types of people that hang out here are inherently less attractive, and sometimes straight-up odd (similar to many parts of SF).

In any case, we made the most of the night, opening 3-4 sets. In these cases, I was still having the attraction problem of building attraction. In the set when I was using teases (one of the firsts), I miscalibrated one and it blew me out. I guess it’s part of the learning process, but still kind of “wtf” nonetheless. In the other memorable set, the girl was extremely boring, but so was the conversation. It was much too logical than I would have liked… not really much of the teasing.

I feel in part, this is due to the sticking point, but I’m sure it also has something to do with the environment we’re in. It wasn’t so much so a “meat market” kind of place, where people are going to meet each other. Excuses, I know, but I’m not going to discount that fact entirely.

On the plus side, I got to know one of the guys that works in the office pretty well. Not entirely sure of his handle, so I’ll keep his name under wraps for the time being. Seems like we have really similar goals though, and the same kind of work ethic to get through all this. From what it looks like, I think we’ll be going out together a fair bit over the next weeks (Monday – Thursdays here I come!). It was great to have a buddy though, and someone to chat with who had had similar experiences with LS.

Not the most eventful night, but I guess you can’t win ‘em all.

Week 1 - Monday

Week 1: Monday

It’s slightly poetic justice that today happens to be the first day of what I hope will be a life-changing few months. It was exactly 1 year ago that I was in Vegas with a buddy from home. It was about 5am, after an epic night of failure. We had gone out to a few clubs, but crippled with approach anxiety, I was unable to speak, let alone open any girls.

I remember telling him, as we were walking through the cold streets, that one year from now things would be different. Even then, if you had asked me, I would have never guessed that I’d be in the position I’m in. Ironically, it’s not that I’m killin’ it now, or that I have outrageously great game, but it’s that I now have a very realistic opportunity of getting there. I’ll take those odds any day of the week.

Here we go…

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Week 1! Pretty usually day at the office, though I did get to solidify most of my schedule for the next couple months. Exciting stuff… really looking forward to it :). Also met some of the other interns – really cool guys. The people here are great… after having worked in some not-so-friendly professional environments, this is pretty much a dream.

Got a suggestion from Bonsai to check out Le Deux’s rocker Monday night. Went with M and another buddy, and got there around ~11ish. Actually my first time being in Le Deux… funny thing is we heard it mentioned in the We Run LA song, on the radio while we were driving there.

The crowd was definitely different. On the plus side, there was a porn party, on the negative, there were a lot of weird rocker guy/gals. We started out with some veto. There was nothing too spectacular about any of the sets I opened, so I won’t go into too much detail, but I went direct on ~4-5 sets. I also opened one of the biggest names in porn… without knowing she was in porn LOL.

One actually hooked really well. Something wasn’t clicking though, and I ended up ejecting. This is obviously a problem (and regression), so let’s look into it:

Ever since I’ve been focusing on the attraction portion, my game has definitely gone into a funk. It used to be that I would open, transition and slip into attraction – and I would do this over and over again the two months while traveling, and got comfortable interacting in sets that way.

Now that I’m opening, transition, and specifically looking to build attraction, I’m getting blown out because the material isn’t hitting properly, and I’m also having the age-old problem of not knowing what to say (something I’m trying to address with trigger words… though I think the overarching problem may have more to do with inner game and subcommunications). To make matters worse, since I haven’t been getting into qualification, my qualification game has gotten rusty as well!

I was able to better diagnose this problem, and I’ll be looking more into it when I got out tomorrow. Once I get a good sense of what’s going wrong, the next step will be to really focus on small-chunking a solution. I get the feeling if I can get this attraction sticking point down, qualification and comfort will fall back into place, and my game will take a big leap forward.

Trigger Words

The focus for Week 1 will be Trigger Words. I can get into set and run through a number of canned, drawn-out routines to get myself into the conversation, but I want to begin making my conversation more organic (i.e. not using an opinion opener into a cold read transition into drawn out intrigue-based attraction routines etc…).

There's a few reasons for this. One major one is that when I'm in social circle situations, or around mutual friends, I really don't feel comfortable spouting off routines. For one, they're a one-time thing if others around can hear it, and once I run out, I might be shit out of luck on the next conversation. Another is that if I get called out or caught being "gamey," the consequences are a lot more sticky than in a cold-approach environment.

The other major reason is that a lot of times the routines seem forced if I'm strictly depending on them. Sometimes they fit perfectly into a puzzle/sequence, but other times, it feels like I'm pushing forward a routine because I'm drawing blanks. A fix to this would be to memorize 46513 routines for each situation, but that's retarded... not what I'm going for at all.

I’m not cutting out routines completely, but I don’t want to be so dependent on them. The mechanism I’ll be using to be less routine dependent will be the Trigger Words system I learned from Mr. M (credit Braddock).

Mandate 1:

Every verbal conversation I have will be focused on trigger words, especially with girls. Small chunking in mind, I’m not even going to focus on building attraction. I literally just want to get my mind thinking in a way that’s conducive to free-flowing conversation.

Mandate 2:

I’m going to spend 30-45 minutes everyday doing trigger word exercises.

I’ll start focusing on sprinkling in lines and routines and building attraction in Week 2.

17 Weeks...

Time to bring the fuckin' heat.

It’s been an eventful few months, and things are about to get even crazier…

Things at the Love Systems office are kicking into full gear, and I’m starting to really get into the swing of things. I’ll be working hard throughout the week at the office, and am completely content doing so – I’m glad I have a substantial way to contribute in return for the training and mentorship.

The 17 week ticker starts now. I have 17 weeks to take my game to new levels, prove myself and hopefully, make it into the Junior Instructor team by the time I move to NYC. Excited? Excitement would be an understatement.

The opportunity is epic. I’ll be working full-time in the office Monday-Thursday, and going out each of those nights around LA. Then I’ll be flying out Friday-Sunday to help and attend various workshops and bootcamps around the country. It’ll no doubt be tiring, and my plan is to literally fall over from exhaustion at the end of Week 17 :).

I’ve worked hard to accomplish all my successes in life and to get to the position where I am now – and it’s that same work ethic that will get me through these next few months.

Tentatively, here’s the progression that I’ve planned:

Week 1-3: The Pain Period: My game is currently at a solid intermediate level. To plow through this stage, it’s really going to take a pain period of going out and hammering in the concepts and theory that I know (a.k.a. building up those reference experiences). I expect a lot of blow-outs as I systematically try everything out, and a lot of empty nights, but I almost feel as though this is a rite of passage that’ll be necessary.

Week 4-6: The Rebuilding: Starting Week 3, I hope to begin rebuilding my game and really taking it from intermediate to advanced. A core of the bootcamps that I’ll be attending and helping at takes place in this period, and I should really be able to solidify my game at the advanced level by the conclusion of Week 6.

Week 7-10: Inversed Learning: Starting Week 7, I envision my game to be at a pretty good place, and I really want to start shifting the focus from learning game to learning how to teach it. Hopefully by this point, I’ll be of solid value to the instructor team, and at a point where I can make a real impact. As they say, learning through teaching is one of the best ways to cement knowledge.

Week 10-14: Results. Starting Week 10, I hope to go from an advanced level to potential instructor level. That is, I want to be working hard on my own game, and focusing more on a results-oriented mindset (i.e. am I getting laid??) instead of a process-oriented mindset. I hope to still be attending bootcamps and workshops on the weekends, though at this point, it should mainly be from a teaching perspective.

Week 15-17: Instructor Evaluation Prep. I plan to set aside the last 3 weeks to prepare for instructor evaluations. That is, reviewing all the theory and material, meeting with the guys I’ve built relationships with, and really focusing on personal study and preparation.

17 weeks… time to bring the fuckin’ heat.

Home Sweet LA

Life is going good! I’m finally back in LA and looking forward to having some fun. Been back for about a week and have been focusing on getting everything in order.

I’ve been out a few times with friends, without really the intention of picking up, and have already noticed many of the subtle changes that have taken place. Amongst other things, I feel attractive, I believe any girl could be into me, and I get the feeling that 90% of the guys in the room don’t have much game. In other words, the foundation to build my game upon has completely changed. Can’t wait to start plowing into field :).

I was also able to work out a position with Love Systems to help out in the office. I’m fortunate to have the opportunity, and plan to give it my all. I’ve never taken that pledge lightly, and will really be putting in 110%… should be an awesome experience!

With college coming to a close (as awesome as it was), a new chapter of life is really starting to open up – let’s see where this takes me.

Epic Classic Writing

http://www.theattractionforums.com/inner-game/107023-beliefs-gold.html

Just restumbled across this blog. I'd read it a long time ago, but just came across it again, and it makes so much more sense now.

The belief that "every girl wants me," is something I definitely saw deeply engrained into instructors like Mr. M, and even some of my close friends like Granite. Awesome, awesome stuff.

Updated Goals

There’s no way around it – it’s time to pay my dues. All the instructors I can think of who have gotten really good have paid their dues… in other words, having a pain period where they went out literally 4-5 times a week for months on end in order to get things really sorted out.

I’ve reached the point where I have a thorough in-field/theoretical understanding of everything, and am quickly approaching a decent level of competence… However, to really take things to the next level, and to really run with the big dogs, I feel I need about at least ~2 months of going out relentlessly to set everything in stone.

The foundations have been set: my inner game and self image is stronger than it’s ever been, I can open consistently and I know what I should be doing in-set at pretty much all points in the model. I’ve also gotten really good at self-diagnosing my problems and thinking back and analyzing everything that I’d done in-set. On top of that, I have an inundation of images and visualizations of well-run sets, and access to a wealth of knowledge, support and mentorship to help deal with the inevitable sticking points.

Specifically, I need to keep attacking things aggressively to find the limits of how far and quickly I can push physical escalation, how quickly I can force frame and qualify, and the repetition to sort out attraction techniques such as dissociative thinking and trigger words. It’s a process for which I can expect numerous blow-outs, but I’m sure at the end of the day, the juice will be worth the squeeze.

Relating this to other successful areas of my life, I’m sure this pain period will be not too different from the span of 100+ unsuccessful interviews I had before I finally got really good (unconsciously competent good) at interviewing for some of the best jobs available.

I’m realizing that the clock is ticking, and that this is literally the one time in my life where I’ll actually have the opportunity to devote this much time to the field. It’s crazy to think that I have the opportunity to go out to Hollywood every night, with the only concern being that I might run out of clean clothes.

The choice is simple… either I push through this now, get to a point of really high-level game, and reap the rewards for years to come, or I don’t, and just remain competent, slowly progressing and getting slightly better as the years go by.

As I’ve heard from a number of the instructors and experienced ACs over the week, I’ve made it past a vast majority of the flat-line period and I’m soo close to hitting the point where my trajectory shoots straight up.

So here are my new goals:

Attraction: I now have a definite understanding of what causes attraction and the various tools that are available to extract it. I’ll need to run set after set to incorporate what works best for me and to develop an unconscious application of the various tools. That is, I should be able to have a conversation, and be able to naturally draw from a line or routine without having to think too much about it. Moreover, I just need more interactions to get better at trigger words and dissociative thinking.

Sexualiztaion & Kino: I know what to do in both these areas, and have already started to get personal reference experiences, but in order to get really good at these skillsets, I’ll need to push them set after set for a period to a point where I’m getting blown-out for being too aggressive. Like Keycahin said, sensing kino is like tasting a fine wine, the more practice you get the better you become at reading the signals and sensing what you can and can’t do.

Subcommuncations: The good news is that my physical subcommuncations are rock solid (I even got the Vercetti sign-off J). What I need to work on now is developing the sensual subcommuncation of the tiger pacing inside his cage. This is the type of dominant subcommunation I’ve seen from Vercetti and Mr. M when they go direct, and fits the style of game I’m looking to adapt. It’ll take some work, since I’ve been working solely on developing a state-based subcommuncation over the past few months, but I think in the end, this new subcomm will be more congruent with my personality and what I think I can do best with.

Time to put that Asian efficiency to work… it’s going to be a crazy February – April.

[Side note: It’s funny, I’ve been thinking so much about pickup recently that it’s infiltrated my dreams for literally at least the past 5 nights. Last night, I actually dreamt I was in Norway, in which I can remember running at least 3 sets… LOL. While visualizations used to be a problem for me, and something I needed to actively do, I find that it comes pretty naturally now… the second I lie down or have a moment to myself, my mind wanders off and starts visualizing either me opening/running a set, me running a past set differently, or one of the instructors opening/running a set. Visualizations are a primary technique recommended in Psycho Cybernetics and is the basis for one of Vercettti’s classic writing articles on how to get better quickly.]

20/20 Hindsight

A bit of a break from the heavy introspection in the prior few posts. Let’s play a game of “Knowing what I know now…”

As my game, and understanding of game continues to improve, I’m finding more and more past experiences where I really wish I had known what I know now. I’m sure these will continue to come to light as I keep getting better, but for entertainment, here are a few of them I’ve accumulated from travel:

Norwegian in Sydney: Me and Granite had these two Norwegians we were gaming, and I kid you not, I spent about 2-3 hours in that set without any real physical or sexual escalation with this girl. I was literally throwing the toolshed of intrigue attraction and comfort building tools, and I think I went through every qualification question and comfort routine I could think of. I had the girl isolated and hooked for a good 2+ fuckin’ hours, in what ended up being a plutonic interaction with no real sexual intent or SOI. Whooops… Knowing what I know now, I would have pushed it waaayy more. In the words of Brad P., “blow me or blow me out.”

Australian in Bali: One of the nights in Bali I had hooked a cute, blonde Australian girl. I had her isolated, attracted, and qualified to the point where she was qualifying herself to me! Yet again, there was absolutely no physical escalation or sexualization. Hahah, knowing what I know now, I would have said some raunchy shit to her… she was definitely a naughty one. Man… that could have been a really fun night, though my failure might have saved Granite from having to hook up with her not-so-attractive sister :D.

English(wo)man in Gili: How to you refer to an English girl… it’s not Englishman right? I digress. Me and Granite met this girl in Gili with an awesome English accent, who was there by herself – apparently her friend had abandoned her. For those that are unaware, Gili is the textbook definition of small, romantic, get-away island. On top of that, the girl was a bonafide slutician and was itching for a lay. We had built quite a bit of buying temperature and humor-based attraction in the day, and when I walked past her in the bar that night, she actually opened me!

I proceeded to isolate her to a seated location (where escalation was all but impossible) and started to attempt to run intrigue-based attraction on her… when that failed, I started to go into boring banter talk. Knowing what I know now, I would have stayed with her when she opened me (instead of following Granite to buy water), and I would have immediately started physically escalating, sexual framing and qualifying her. Mind you, I was still battling inner game demons of attractiveness, and I probably wouldn’t have believed that would have worked at the time (and thus probably wouldn’t have had the necessary subcommuncations to execute), but we’re playing “knowing what I know now,” not “could I really have done what I should have been doing.”

American in Bali: One of the more successful nights of the trip. I had hooked a cute small American blonde on the dance floor and had actually escalated to make-out (thanks to grinding). She was actually a really sweet girl, and we had a lot of fun, but I messed things up logistically. Knowing what I know now, I would have bounced her out of the club earlier (instead of at 4am), and I would have definitely thrown some big sexual hoops at her to get her aroused.

Whether or not it would have made a difference at the end is debatable since her hotel was right next to mine, but at the least, it would have made the interaction all the more fun. The biggest mistake was not continually escalating – I had built sufficient attraction, qualification and comfort, so the next step would have been to logistically escalate and then move into seduction (for which sexualization would have helped a lot).

Australian in Chang Mai: Knowing what I know now, I should have kicked Granite in the balls and swooped Melissa – she was a genuine sweetheart. Lol, jk.. I would never do such a thing… ;).

Norwegian in Laos: The interaction went well, but knowing what I know now, like Henry, I should have physically escalated more, and maybe thrown in some small-medium sexual hoops. This set was cold all around, so who knows… but! I also now know that Norwegians tend to be cold in terms of IOIs right up until you get them in bed (where a demon supposedly comes out as they proceed to rape you).

And that concludes “Knowing what I know now.” Damn, I can’t wait to hook my next set… it’s going to be carnage!

Bootcamp Reflection

Looking back, these past 10 days have been one hell of an experience. I’ve had the opportunity to meet and learn from some of the best instructors, as well as a group of really awesome ACs. It was cool meeting the other students too, and seeing people from all walks of life coming together. In the week, I’ve achieved a number of paradigm shifts, have a cleaner outlook on my personal progression, and have made a number of leaps forward in my own game.

I came into Oslo with very specific goals hashed out, and looking back, I’ve more or less accomplished most of them to a significant degree. Reading through my 11/21 blog, I was actually amazed by the amount I’ve achieved since then – it’s only been a week and a half! Nothings perfect, but it’s enough to be able to put a check next to each box.

Outer Game / Mechanics

1.) Opening: I was looking to clean up my opening and to do it more consistently, and this is something I knocked out of the park. Opening, at least in a day game and club/bar setting is no longer an issue. Moreover, I went from being strictly indirect to pretty much having direct be my modus operandum.

2.) Attraction: My goal was to be able to have more control over attraction. I now have the framework and the tools to work on this, though this will be my next major hurdle in my progression. Not only am I changing the primary type of attraction I’m using, from intrigue to more qualifying and force framing (as well as teasing, takeaways etc…), but I’m also looking to change the subcommuncations I use during the phase. On top of that, I need to better develop the skillset of dissociative, non-linear thinking, which is fundamental to attraction.

Inner Game

1.) Attractiveness: Knocked this one out of the park too. As I guessed, the sheer inundation of reference experience and the very being around Mr. M for a week got rid of 95% of any residual limiting beliefs I was having regarding attraction, and just race and pickup in general. Just by watching him extract attraction in minutes within sets (of mainly blondes), seeing the types of girls he dates, the respect he commands from those around him and the general persona he’s built for himself was enough to push out any limiting beliefs I had about myself.

My initial concern before coming to Oslo was that maybe it was too good to be true. Maybe his game wasn’t as good as the hype was, or maybe he was just pulling girls that weren’t that cute. Unlikely, but you can’t blame my skepticism – I’ve gone 22 years of living with maybe seeing 2 random reference experiences of Asian guys with legitimately hot (not just cute, but hot) girls.

There’s no bullshit. The guy is a 5’5” (5’7” with Altitude Shoes :)) average looking Asian dude with game like nothing I’ve ever seen before -- he’s dating bombshells, it’s evident he’s looked up to by the other instructors, and he’s really at the forefront of dating science. Moreover, he’s got one of the most aggressive style game out of the instructor team, which in itself, was not something I expected. Inspiring stuff…

I still laugh when I think about when we were in seminar talking about approach invitations and getting approached by women, and Mr. M goes “yeah… I’ve tried that method, nothing happens with me. I’ve been approached maybe 4 times in my life.” LOL.

Skillsets

1.) Kino: On my way to achieving this one. Before, I would rely on light arm touches and maybe a push here and there as “kino.” Ironically, prolonged light arm touches are exactly what Keychain said should be avoided – it’s awkward and doesn’t accomplish much.

From Keychain’s lesson, and with some 1 on 1 help with Micha and Mr. M, I was able to develop proper technique for physically escalating. As I predicted, it’s all pretty simple stuff… I was just lacking the mechanics and structure before to implement something better than what I was doing.

The best part was that Micha and Mr. M took the time to demonstrate on me how they would actually do it, and then I ran it on them as though they were the set to get feedback until I got it correctly. Mr. M’s kino definitely has a more dominant side (i.e. wrist holding) that fits well against the Asian stereotype, whereas if Micha (who is a beast of a man) tried that, the girls would likely get intimidated. Micha’s kino was gentler and more similar to Keychain’s demonstration, but also worked very well. I imagine I’m gong to work on developing a combination of the two, as both styles seemed to be pretty congruent with me.

2.) Sexualization: I have a clear and definite understanding of how to implement this. I was able to do so during the day 1 in-field, and got a taste of how much fun it makes the set. Unfortunately, I didn’t get far enough into set during the day 2 in-field to implement any of the medium/large sexual hoops, but it’s something I’ll definitely be working on in conjunction to the new subcommunication I’m trying to develop. Man game baby!

As I said a week ago, Sexualization was really a function of having that inner game shift in which I become free in expressing my sexual intent – the idea that I’m hitting on a girl, she knows it, and I’m perfectly okay with that. I can say I have definitely achieved a large part of this I don’t give a fuck inner game shift, and want to continue to reinforce it. To quote Micha from the day 1 in-field, “Yeah, I’m hitting on you… so what? You’re fuckin’ hot!”

Long-Term Goals and Executive Summary

So I said that my longer term goal of the bootcamp was to have a clear path cut out for what I need to do after what I want to achieve is done. Seeing how I pretty much largely achieved almost everything I was seeking out to do, the path of what to do next is actually pretty clear. The bootcamp has really defined a trajectory for which I can follow to really get this handled.

The executive summary is that the bootcamp really is as worthwhile as the reviews say it is. As Sheriff said it would, it really catapulted my progress forward, and moreover, changed my perspective and understanding of game. By being around so many different styles and adaptations of the principles, I now truly understand the cliché saying that it’s not about the lines and routines, but the subcommuncations and how they’re used.

Having the chance to witness the guys in day game, stripper game and night game, and just being around guys in-field who had a wealth of knowledge in the framework/model I thought I knew well was like going to the Costco of reference experiences and filling my cart to the top… now I just need to stock up on personal reference experiences.

I won’t go as far to say that the bootcamp was life-changing (at least not yet), but I can say for sure that it’s probably saved me multiple months in terms of overall progression; both in what I was able to overcome, and in the amount of time it will take me to accomplish my upcoming goals. I’m just fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to attend, and to have been in the right place in my progression to maximize my benefit from it (thanks, Granite!).

Other Side of the Table

On the second night of the in-field in London, I had the opportunity to help with the ACs. I paired up with Simon and we worked primarily with two of the students for the night. Being on the other side of the table really provided some perspective on what it’s like to teach.

First, I’ll say that it’s not an easy thing to do… I realized that teaching is not so much about having good game, but also about being able to maintain and inspire confidence, and to get the student feeling comfortable being outside of his comfort zone. On the flip side, it can be a really rewarding experience when you help the student progress past their sticking points. Working as an AC also made me realize how good Mr. M is at teaching and working with students in-field. It can definitely be a relentlessly tiring and challenging process.

Helping some of the other students also made me realize how far along I’d come in terms of my own progression. It wasn’t that long ago where I could have easily seen myself in the shoes of some of the students – where approach anxiety was almost crippling, and getting into set required the forceful pushing of another. I caught myself momentarily wondering why it was that difficult, but quickly realized that I could definitely relate to the feelings of immense approach anxiety. It’s no wonder that most of the guys who make instructor are the guys who were once horrible with women – it seems to be a necessary evil in order to be able to relate to the feelings of the students.

Being on the other side also helped reinforce the idea that approaching really isn’t that big a deal. Even the worst blow-outs I witnessed weren’t that bad, and in the end, there really was no actual ill effect. Looking back, having the opportunity to help others for the night actually further helped in the reduction of my own personal approach anxiety, which has already been mitigated to an (easily?) manageable level.

Another thing I noticed from the other coaches was that by being an AC, you develop the skillset of having an eye to quickly spot out good sets, as it’s usually the case that you have to point out the sets for the student to approach. As I move onto the next level of approaching, that is, developing the approach habit, being in this capacity was something that really benefited my own personal progression.

Overall, it was a really enjoyable experience, and a great way to bond with some of the guys (students and ACs alike). It’d be great to have the opportunity to continue helping in the future, and I’d jump at the opportunity if it presents itself.